Good Morning No-one.
Hahaha! My evil plan worked! My secret plan to feign disinterest in my blog so that the readers will drop off one by one, leaving me readerless and free to divulge my most terrible secrets and the nasty things I really get up to.
That's the real reason I haven't been updating with regularity for a month. Okay 2 months.
Okay this is depressing. I was just trying to think of a terrible secret to write and I can't think of any. I have no terrible secrets.

Okay, you can all start reading again.
Hello?
Well the new place is starting to feel like home. Whatever home is. I am starting to feel like home is the inside of a moving van.
It's perpetually fridgid here. I sometimes have to wear mittens to type. I know how Strongbad feels.
It doesn't help that my dog thinks the place is haunted. This place does not make a very cool haunted house. I mean the whole 70's decor, orange globe lamps and wood panelling doesn't lend itself to hauntings now does it?
Unless you're talking about the ghost of Linda Lovelace or John Holmes. Personally I think my dog is full of shit. Since we moved in she's been creeping around silently with her hackles up staring at random spots in the house.
But last night, in the middle of our peaceful slumber the window screen mysteriously fell on her head as she lay in bed. She has taken this as solid evidence of the paranormal. And what's worse, she thinks they are out to get her.
This morning I get up, Mulders makin breakfast, the house is full of EMF detectors, EVP instruments and heat sensors. Never trust a dog with your visa card.
Latest update on the Ultrasound fiasco. I had another ultrasound done. On the topic of the porn industry, There's only one kind of scenario where it would be okay for the Doctor to scream out "OH My GOD!!" while she's examining you. This wasn't one of them. In all other cases this is generally a bad thing.

And yes she did yell out Oh My God. And NO I am not pregnant.
Well at least I got to pee before this one.
Anyway, I must get to work. More later.